How To Waste Your Life In Only 7 Steps

Since you clicked on this post you obviously want to learn how to waste your life and be miserable forever. Great!

Forget about being happy and just follow these simple steps:

#1 Watch More TV

Watching TV is entertaining, your brain gets to standby-mode, your body can relax for hours and hours and hours. Sounds like fun!

Watch more TV, catch up with all the good movies and shows. Live your life through fictional characters instead of leaving your comfy bedroom.

Who needs sunlight, exercise and friends, anyway?

#2 Set Only Short Term Goals

Short term goals that are easy to achieve should be the only goals you set in your life. Even better if it only takes less than five minutes of work to get your dopamine rush.

Long term goals that require hard work and consistency are for people who want to live a successful life, so don´t even think about long term goals with detailed plans how to achieve them.

Watching the next season of your favorite show in one sitting counts as a short term goal, so don´t worry.

#3 Spend More Time Alone

Being around other people is exhausting. You have to listen to their problems, leave your house and even need to get dressed for them.

If you spend more time alone you don´t need to take a shower or even leave your bed. Nobody will disturb you binge-watching that new show you read about on the internet.

And since there´s no one you can talk to about the shows you just watched, you can just start the next show. Great deal!

#4 Eat Only Food That Has More Ingredients Than You Can Count

Since you don´t even understand the ingredient label you don´t have to read it, right?

Food that comes frozen or wrapped in plastic is easier and faster to cook. That leaves you more time to watch TV.

You can even eat it in front of your screen without pausing the video. You only need your fingers to eat it, that saves you time you would otherwise would spend cleaning dishes.

Perfect for the next movie you wanted to watch!

#5 Complain More

Life sucks.

It´s raining outside, you got stuck in the daily AM traffic again, your co-workers talk shit all day and politicians are all corrupt.

If you want to life a miserable life you should complain more about all the things you can´t change. Complain to everyone: you family and friends, your co-workers, even your bus driver. Never stop complaining.

If you complain long enough step #3 will take care of itself and you have saved time again.

#6 Go To Bed At Random Times

Life would just not be fun if you went to bed everyday at the same time.

Imagine! Your body could get used to your daily sleeping schedule and your sleep quality could improve! Gasp! Don´t let that happen!

Better go to bed at random times, even in the middle of the day. You are guaranteed to feel like shit afterwards and feel even more miserable.

#7 Never Leave Your Comfort Zone

Why go on an adventure when you could just stay in bed and watch TV? It´s more comfortable this way.

Making memories is for children. Talking to people you met at a bar in a tiny village in Vietnam is so overrated. You could feel uncomfortable getting lost in Osaka at night! You don´t want that to happen.

If you want to waste your life there is no better way than never leaving your comfort zone, I promise!

Hopefully, these steps helped you to waste your life and be unhappy forever. You are welcome.

Author: modernsuperhero

A superhero never quits!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s